


prisonbreak

by ifonlyicouldwrite



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dream smp prison arc, Gen, Happy Ending, Light Angst, i guess spoilers for tommy's latest stream, it's just a HINT. just a SMIDGE I SWEAR, no beta we die like wilbur, this is ighthearted dw lmaoooo, this time i wrote a fic based on one of MY posts jsfkhfgd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:16:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29635218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifonlyicouldwrite/pseuds/ifonlyicouldwrite
Summary: based on:" how funny would it have been if jack “member of team rocket” manifold went full-on cartoon villain when finding out that tommy was in prison and said “NO??? I HAVE TO BE THE ONE WHO KILLS HIM THO??” and just. tried to break him out. he resolves the security issue. he just fucking drags tommy out of the cell somehow. "(@ soleilorsomething on tumblr)enjoy jfsfdsklgh
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 20
Kudos: 167
Collections: Cheshire's MCYT recs!





	prisonbreak

**Author's Note:**

> just warnings for some swearing, some references to the exile arc, and just a little casual talk of murder/death? it's,,, it's lighthearted i SWEAR lmaoooo just think about Jack's plot but in a cartoon-villain light

Jack hadn’t expected to have an eventful day when he made his daily commute to the Big Innit Hotel, heaving a heavy sigh after remembering his failed plot from the previous day. 

“Who knew Tommy _wouldn’t_ stand on the big red X for more than three seconds?” he muttered, taking careful steps along the Prime Path. “And why the _fuck_ did he _keep_ the anvil?! He owns a _hotel_ , for fucks sake, he can’t be _that_ poor, right?!”

He stopped before the towering red building, shedding his wooly coat and putting on his _Customer Service Face™_. He sat down at the receptionist desk, idly scrolling through Twitter as he waited for customers to arrive. 

His eyes widened almost comically as he saw his boss’s latest tweet.

_"just got locked in fucking prison with dream"_

Before he could process the news, however, a figure walked towards the desk. He quickly shut off his screen and put on a stiff smile in an attempt to hide his mounting concern.

“Welcome to the Big Innit Hotel, how can I be of service today?” he said, nearly robotically. Sam sent him a strange look from across the counter, and Jack noted the shaking of his hands.

“Jack, there’s been…” he hesitated, as if debating whether or not he was trustworthy. Jack almost took offense to the creeper’s suspicious tone, but then he recalled Sam caught him setting up a catapult for one of his plots and decided he was probably justified in his wariness. “There was a _commotion_ at the prison, and Tommy is stuck inside until further notice. I came by to make sure procedures would be running smoothly over here until the issue is resolved.”

Jack’s eye twitched as he received confirmation of his fears, barely containing himself from facepalming. “Sam. _My friend_. Why, exactly, is Tommy Innit in prison?” His voice was still in customer service mode, though some of his exasperation managed to seep through.

“That is, unfortunately, confidential, Jack Manifold. Don’t worry, he hasn’t been convicted of any crimes. As I said, he’s simply there until further notice.” He paused, looking around the entrance hall, seemingly satisfied with its current conditions. “Alright, I have to go contact a few of my associates, so I’ll be unavailable for the next… five hours or so. Make sure nothing happens to the hotel, alright? See ya later.”

“Thank you for visiting the Big Innit Hotel! We hope you enjoyed your stay, and have a nice day!” Jack called out in a saccharine voice, clenching his fists from underneath the table.

Once Sam was well out of view, he began pacing across the entrance. “What the _fuck?!_ Tommy can’t be in _jail!_ How am I supposed to kill him if he’s all locked up, then? No, no, no, I had a _plan_ for tomorrow, too! Dammit, I’d have to postpone or literally _break him out of_ —oh my god.” He stopped in the middle of the room, eyes lighting up as if he’d been struck by a fantastic idea. The idea, of course, being, “ _I need to break him out of prison!_ ”

“It’s genius! _Foolproof_ , even! Just like my other pl—well, no, not like my other plans because this one’s going to work this time! Five hours, he says? _Well_ , then I’d better get to fuckin work.”

* * *

Jack never thought breaking into a prison would be so _hard_. 

“It’s just a _prison_ , and _I’m_ Jack Manifold!” he’d thought, confidently marching through the first few gates. 

He set his spawn and got to work trying to decipher the redstone codes, only to be met with a chasm of lava. He placed a single block to make a pathway for himself and watched as twenty arrows whizzed by him, narrowly missing his head.

“Oh. This is gonna be a _long_ five hours.”

* * *

Tommy didn’t know how much longer he could take. After _everything_ he’d done to shake Dream’s grasp on him, he was back at what seemed like square one—living out his worst nightmares with no one by his side. No one, except for _Dream_. Again.

His voice was nearly gone from the screams that tore from it, eyes still bloodshot from the rivers of tears that had streamed down his cheeks. Dream stopped trying to talk after the sobs started up again, instead opting to write in one of the books he hadn’t burned. Tommy wondered if the silence was any better.

On one hand, he didn’t feel like throwing up at Dream’s voice.

On the other, there was nothing to drown out the ones in his mind, playing back memories he’d long since buried.

_Tommy, you are hereby exiled from L’Manburg._

The explosions still rang in his ears, bringing his mind back to the dark places he knew so well. 

_Independence, or death._

The quiet popping of the lava engulfed his thoughts as he waited for something— _anything_ —to happen. He felt silly, wishing again—as if that had done him any good before. He felt silly… yet he held out the hope that _somehow_ some miracle would occur and save him from the cramped cell.

Somehow, something did.

* * *

“AHA!” Jack exclaimed after he finally pushed the right button. After his long journey, he’d gotten to an open room with a bed and a curtain of lava. “TAKE THAT YOU STUPID REDSTONE PRICK!”

From the other side of the lava, both prisoners’ heads shot up, bright blue eyes meeting hollow black ones in confusion and bewilderment.

“JACK MANIFOLD?” a hoarse voice shouted from the other side of the curtain, and Jack rolled his eyes at his annoying voice.

“HELLO TOMMY! HOLD ON A SECOND, I CAN’T SEE YOU YET.”

He looked over at the wall of buttons and shrugged, closing his eyes and pushing them at random while hoping for the best. He opened them to find the lava slowly retracting and grinned at his ~~luck~~ _skill_.

He tossed one of his enderpearls over, narrowly missing the edge as he crashed onto the obsidian floor. Tommy was staring at him wide-eyed, as if he were a ghost about to disappear.

“Jack?” he whispered, and if he didn’t hate the kid so much, his heart may have broken at the state of his voice. Instead, he grunted, passing him an enderpearl and telling him to shut up.

“Look, Sam’s not here, so we’re gonna have to go, like… _now_ .” He forced a smile, and looked around the cell, missing the fresh tears pooling in Tommy’s eyes. He, however, did _not_ miss the flabbergasted green figure sitting upon a chest in the opposite corner.

“How. The. _Fuck._ Did _you_ get here?” Dream asked through gritted teeth. Jack couldn’t seem to move in his shock, but Tommy was quick to take action and flip the green figure off before throwing his enderpearl across the orange abyss. 

“FUCK YOU DREAM! I HOPE YOU ROT IN THIS GODDAMN PRISON, GREEN BOY!” he shouted, wearing out the last of his voice. Jack was quick to follow suit and scramble to the other side of the pit, once again hitting buttons until the lava came back down.

Dream seemed too crestfallen to even try to escape with them, and Jack quickly flipped him off one last time before they went out of his view.

He turned to leave, only to be met with a shaking Tommy looking at him as though he had fallen from the heavens and bestowed some miracle on him.

“Oi, stop just fuckin standing there, we’re on a damn time limit here,” he said impatiently, quickly walking back the way he came. He thought he heard a quiet “ _thank you_ ” from behind him, but he was too busy to care.

He had to set up the next day’s plot to kill him, after all.

* * *

_Extra:_

Tommy couldn’t believe Jack Manifold had _broken into_ Sam’s _inescapable_ prison—just to save him. He knew, from that moment forth, that Jack would be one of his most trusted associates. Someone who would never seek to harm him—someone loyal he could depend upon. He’d even given him an anvil the other day, _right_ when his last one had broken! How lucky he was to have a friend like Jack, who would never hurt him ever. How lucky, indeed.

**Author's Note:**

> i. why did i write this during class FDLKDHKF
> 
> yeah, this is most certainly ooc but I find it funny so :)
> 
> comments are pog!! if ya feel like leaving one!! <3


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